John and I first met in college on a night that would change the course of our lives. He refilled my solo cup with Jungle Juice and asked for my AOL Instant Messenger screen name—yes, you read that right! At the time, I was still a teenager, but the connection was instant. Nearly two decades later, we have grown together, enduring the highs and lows of life as best friends and partners. From our modest 680-square-foot apartment, sharing a car, and surviving on one salary during graduate school, to becoming a married couple, we’ve shared it all.
After seven years together, we tied the knot on the Jersey shore, barefoot in the sand with our closest family and friends. Our wedding song, “Angel” by Jack Johnson, echoed in the background as I walked down the aisle, and in that moment, I knew my life with John had only just begun. We spent the next few years traveling and hiking, building a home in the country, and dreaming about growing our family.
But growing our family wasn’t easy. What followed was a 3-year journey of infertility, five failed IUI cycles, one IVF attempt that ended in miscarriage, and finally, a successful IVF cycle against all odds. With less than a 5% chance of success, the odds were stacked against us, but my determination never wavered. After over 1,000 days of trying, countless injections, and an immeasurable amount of heartbreak, I finally found out I was pregnant.
But that victory was only the beginning.
During my pregnancy, I endured hyperemesis gravidarum, high blood pressure, constant nausea, and the looming threat of preeclampsia. By 21 weeks, I was labeled as high risk, and at 26 weeks, I was admitted to the hospital with severe complications. Doctors told me that if I didn’t deliver the baby that night, both my life and the baby’s were at risk. I heard the words no mother should ever hear: “If we don’t deliver her tonight, you could die. If we do deliver tonight, there’s no guarantee she’ll survive.”
Despite these terrifying words, I knew that our baby was a fighter. Four months too soon, I gave birth to our daughter, a tiny 1-pound, 8-ounce miracle. What was supposed to be one of the happiest moments of our lives quickly turned into a heart-wrenching reality. Instead of being placed on my chest, she was rushed to the NICU, hooked up to machines, and surrounded by doctors and nurses. I couldn’t hold her for a week, and I wouldn’t bring her home for over four long months.
The NICU journey was anything but easy. Our daughter, Addie, faced countless medical hurdles, including necrotizing enterocolitis (NEC), a life-threatening infection that affects the intestines of premature babies. NEC is one of the main causes of death for preemies, and we were told the chances of survival were slim. But Addie fought every single day. There were moments when she seemed to be improving, only to have her health take a sudden and drastic turn for the worse.
One of the most terrifying days in the NICU came when the nurses called us in urgently, saying we needed to pack an overnight bag because Addie wasn’t doing well. When we arrived, we saw the long faces of the medical team, their eyes filled with concern. Addie’s skin had turned greyish-blue, and she was barely moving. The doctors told us this was an improvement from how she had been an hour before, but to us, it didn’t feel like progress. It felt like our world was crumbling.
But Addie defied the odds. She survived NEC, but her journey didn’t end there. As she grew, she struggled with weight gain, feeding issues, and frequent vomiting. She faced multiple surgeries and was later diagnosed with Short Bowel Syndrome (SBS), a condition that occurs when a significant portion of the intestines is removed or damaged. Despite all of this, Addie remained strong, and she never stopped fighting.
The doctors had told us that most children with SBS had lost a portion of their intestines. But Addie’s case was different—she still had all of her intestines, yet the damage from NEC and malrotation had taken its toll. Her intestines were functioning, but not in the way they should. After months of tests and medical evaluations, the diagnosis of SBS finally explained everything Addie had gone through.
There were times when I questioned whether we could continue fighting. The medical routines, the feeding tubes, the constant doctor visits—it all felt like too much. But through it all, Addie’s spirit shone through. She was a warrior. At nearly two years old, she was still undergoing medical treatments, traveling to Boston for care, and attending therapy sessions weekly. Yet despite all of her medical challenges, Addie had the heart of a fighter, a spirit of joy, and a love for life that was nothing short of inspiring.
One of the most memorable moments in our journey came when Addie turned six months old. After weeks of being in and out of the hospital, she had another surgery to explore her intestines further.
The surgeon called me during the operation to say that he had found something alarming. Addie’s intestines had twisted around themselves, cutting off blood flow. If we hadn’t gone through with the surgery, she wouldn’t have survived much longer.
That day, Addie became a true miracle. After the surgery, the surgeon told me how relieved he was that they had caught it in time. “You don’t know how many babies we lose to this condition,” he said. “We just lost one earlier this week.” It was a sobering moment, but I knew in my heart that Addie was meant to survive. From that moment on, I celebrated her half-birthday in remembrance of the day she defied the odds and lived to see another day.
Addie’s fight isn’t over. She still faces challenges with feeding, gaining weight, and managing the effects of her SBS. But every day, she proves that miracles are real. She’s a happy, empathetic, Disney-loving little girl who has brought joy and love into our lives. And as we wait for our next family member through adoption, we know that Addie’s strength will inspire us every step of the way.
This journey has been hard—so hard—but it’s also been filled with grace, resilience, and an unbreakable bond between mother and daughter. I am proud to say that I gave birth to my hero. Addie is the strongest person I know, and I will continue to fight for her every single day. Life may never be easy, but with her by my side, I know we can face whatever comes next.